Tuesday, 28 March 2006

Oh MY er!!

Dudes, what a vexatious day i have had!

I have had no time all day to read blogs, make comments, "add" new friends on myspace, and I like barely used the e mail. Imagine my surprise, i had to work hard for the money.

Lorrrrrrrrrrd love a duck, cos he ain't loving meeeeeeeeeee

All frickin' day i had question after question floating over my workstation's partition, in the style of the signal/beep sent out by Batfink, which is all good an well in animania but in belmania, let's just give it a nick nack paddywack, because basically, at the end of the day and ultimately, comes down to dollars and cents, yeah, it was getting to the point where i was waiting to be asked permission to go to the latrine, suh. I guess i'm going to have to remove that photo of Captain Mainwaring from my desk and buy a big wallet and put it in there, praps i should just buy a bum bag, retro cooool. I have to confess that it got to the point, it was pointerama, folks, where i pretended i couldn't hear because i knew that if i replied my voice would reveal my irritation and i really didn't want that to happen. So unseemly for a lllady to be shrill, innit?

Then i got inveigled into sitting on a last minute judging panel for a competition, the entries were very interesting but it's all terrrrrrrribly last minute, dahling. Verdict due yesterday and muggins here is rrrrroped in for the paperwork. Unfortunately not because i'm viewed as top drawuh material, no, because i am seen as a Mainwaring, a stickler for following prrrrrrrocecdure, no matter how goddamn inept. So it serves me right rally.

Anyhoo, lucky to have a goddamn job and work with nice people really, very nice people, they put up with me! Still i hadn't come to that conclusion by the time i boarded the bus with Tiger, Billie, Doughnut and the rest of the Double Deckers come 5.30 p.m.

Fortunately i got a window seat from which i could glower at "the streets of Sydney" (great song by Tim Freedman, surely? Dude , what a songsmith, larrikin yet intellectual, our next Peter Allen) while petulantly and maniacally chewing my lower lip.

Then it happened no i didn't bite off my bottom lip.

My eyes focused on a chap doing a kind of fitness stroll, yeah, a more sophisticated version of a power walk, I guess. And I looked at him and i thought while screwing up my eyes and nose, it helps me think and makes me look really, really cooote, better than a smudge on my nose and kerchief on my head, he looks familiar, and then i realised he looked like a young Mike Myers.

So the vexatious mood weakened and my eyes returned to the bus and started looking at the other passengers with a softer perspective and near benign smile on my lips. Then diagonally oppposite I spotted me a strawberry blond version of Mike Myers.

It really, really is true. It was crazy. I kept darting my eyes from Strawberry Blond Mike to Fitness First Mike on the street. I was kinda hoping that a like fully blond Mike would appear but alas he didn't board my bus. Still it lifted my mood and made me smile and think of Mike Myers and how great that "so i married an axe murderer" film is. My first proper introduction to him. Then i thought about his brilliant impression of Ronnie Wood as a celebrity reporter for Entertainment Tonight.

Talk about larrrrrf!

Images and highlights of the comedian that IS Myers just kept rrrrollin' through my mind. By the time I had to get off the bus, i'd come over all cheerful again, ready for good time central.

Cue for song, come on everybody, get down, get with it!

A co meeee deee enn, A co meeeee dee enn,
he/she'll never let you down
They're honest and funny, right up to the end
A wonderful, wonderful, co meeeeeeeeeeeee deeeeeeeeeeee en

(To the tooon of " four legged friend " by Smokey Dawson. If you don't know it, you haven't lived, sweetheart, i mean, ring me now! i''ll sing it to you for 75 cents a minute, just song, just song)

2 comments:

boy said...

Once, on a busy road in London, I thought Juliette Binoche undressed me with her eyes, but it's simply not true. I hope you have enjoyed this as much as I have. Goodbye.

David said...

Is that what she said? 'I hope you have enjoyed this as much as I have. Goodbye'? Great story dude.