Hey Moana*

Some say carpe diem while others carp and demean.

(Now that would be a top little quote for the 2009 Women's Wit calendar – I’d like the quote in Times New Roman 12 pt but Mistress Bel written in hot pink 16 pt Monotype Corsiva or Lucida Calligraphy, probably the latter as it is nice and subtle.) It also has the potential to be an up little ditty to be sung by Racey, yours B. Bacharach.

While the mistress can be the cow with the crumpled horn, she generally restricts her whinging and funk attacks to herself, the select few sounding boards called friends, or cyberspace. Very noble and discreet.

One's railing and wailing sessions are generally short. The mistress having the maturity of a five year old can be easily cajoled into a good mood with a few soothing enquiries about herself, a pat on the head , and a dark blue cellophane bag of mixed sweets works a treat.

However, I am never the whinging raaag in the workplace, or on the mobe on the bus for that matter. That is just too disgraceful. Particularly when the whinging is expressed with a bubble gum accent meets Gilmore Girl banter. UGH. I mean to say, I didn’t go through the Blitz to suffer that. Indeed I did NOT.

Lady Grump, Lady Grump, it’s not alright, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh.


*Bo Diddley or Craig Mclachlan song - it's always your choice on NSR